


An Evil Witch's Best Friend

by AlexRyzlinGold



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-04
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2017-12-07 10:51:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/747690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexRyzlinGold/pseuds/AlexRyzlinGold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Regina liked Pongo. She generally liked animals, particularly since she had learnt how to listen to them. It had been a weird thing to learn. It had started with Daniel teaching her how to talk and listen to horses. It had been second nature and once Regina found herself spending all her spare time in the White Palace with nothing to do she had started seeing if she could communicate to other creatures the same way."</p>
<p>What started off off as two very short stories about Pongo and Regina interacting has now turned into a series of related one-shots of Pongo and Regina being friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Meeting

Disclaimer: I don’t own OUAT, sadly

Court was always kind of boring but today was something else entirely. Normally there was at least something to interest her; intelligence reports, feuding neighbours that soon realised it was better to sort it out by their selves after a few sarcastic words and magic problems tended to be the most common but occasionally there was the case that just interested Regina. So far today there hadn’t been anything of the sort and Regina was pretty sure that if she listened to many more cases she’d go insane. She sat up slightly as the two farmers left after having wasted her time by talking and solving their problem by themselves (they could have done that anywhere, but for some reason felt the need to bother her, it was frustrating). Bursting into the audience chamber and pushing the farmers aside came the most annoying Lady (she used the term loosely) Regina had ever met. Cruella De Vil. Following Cruella at a much slower pace were a couple and a spotted dog. Regina had to admit that the dog’s colouring was interesting.

“Lady De Vil. What can I do for you?”

Cruella started to talk, rant really about how the couple had stolen her dogs and puppies and some other things that just turned into nothing more than garbled noise. She held up a hand and Cruella stopped speaking. The dog wasn’t Cruella’s. That much was obvious, she wouldn’t have come to Regina for something like that unless the local law enforcement had already told her to go away.

“What is your name?”

The man stepped forward and started to speak but Regina quickly cut him off.

“Not you.”

There was silence in the hall before the spotted dog let out a brief bark.

“It’s nice to meet you Pongo. My name is Regina. Now, tell me what this is about.”

Pongo started to bark and yip while Cruella stared at Regina with horror. The couple just looked confused in that sort of dumb way that Regina had seen on Charming so many times.

Regina sighed. “He’s not your dog, Cruella. I’d suggest you leave him and his family alone otherwise I’ll turn you into a fur coat.”

“I don’t have any fur!”

Regina sneered at Cruella. “I can fix that if you’d like.”

Cruella turned and fled the audience chamber. At least that was slightly interesting.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pongo aplogises for his part in everyone believing that Regina murdered Archie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set before Snow finds out about Cora and Regina.  
> Spoilers for 2.10 to 2.13  
> Disclaimer: I still don’t own OUAT.

Most of Storybrooke still evaded Regina like the plague. They’d sneer and mutter and even cross to the other side of the street sometimes. There were a few that didn’t. Charming just pushed his way through everything in life and that didn’t change with his dealings with her, at least Snow kept him on a short leash for his own good now that she was back. Snow didn’t sneer or mutter or cross the road, but she didn’t exactly seek Regina out. Emma did though, and it was annoying because really all Regina wanted was to see her son, not the woman who took her son away from her. She didn’t see Henry. He was just never around whenever someone else from the Charming family tree turned up to badger her about something (and really you couldn’t throw a spell without hitting someone Snow was related to _somehow_ ).

Ruby wasn’t bad. She and Granny still served her and occasionally Ruby made small talk. Most of the time she seemed too preoccupied. Regina imagined it wasn’t easy for her to work in the diner with her wolf senses. She’d pick up all the overpowering smells and noises. One day Regina left a packet of cigarettes with her tip. Ruby had smiled at her the next time she came in. At least cigarettes didn’t smell like raw body odour from days of not showering after heavy labour. All the dwarves eating at once must just about make Ruby faint.

Archie was the same as he had always been, which was slightly disconcerting seeing as she had been blamed with his murder. He still greeted her with a happy ‘beautiful day, isn’t it?’ no matter when or where they ran into each other but he had been much busier once everyone was back in Storybrooke. Things needed planning and supervision and people needed to deal with the fact that they were trapped. Who better than the psychologist with a PhD from ‘Dark-Curse University’? He was a good man but sometimes he pushed too much and Regina wanted nothing more than to tell him her deepest darkest secrets and to scare him so badly he’d stop asking her when she was coming for her next appointment. She hadn’t gone since his supposed death. She didn’t want anyone thinking that she would actually complete the job her mother had framed her for. They’d probably start watching her closely if she so much as had a conversation with Archie and really, Regina couldn’t be bothered with that. There was one drawback though, and that was Pongo.

Regina liked Pongo. She generally liked animals, particularly since she had learnt how to listen to them. It had been a weird thing to learn. It had started with Daniel teaching her how to talk and listen to horses. It had been second nature and once Regina found herself spending all her spare time in the White Palace with nothing to do (practising magic in the palace would have been suicide) she had started seeing if she could communicate to other creatures the same way. It was easy enough to apply the knowledge onto other animals. Birds were plentiful and the occasional cat found its way inside the palace through the kitchens or one of the ground floor windows. The royal hunting dogs were nice once Regina got to know them and tended to be bettered behaved around her, at least when they got to stay with her in the same room. It had annoyed some of the soldiers that whenever they tried to train the dogs and she walked past that the dogs would bound off to find her and only stay when she ordered them to. They never reported it to Leopold though; they didn’t want to be seen as lacking in talent.

Rumple had been surprised when she had refused his lessons in communicating to animals had had assumed that Cora had taught her when he found out she already could. She had never seen fit to correct him. So yes, Regina missed Pongo. Which was why she had been glad that most of the times she saw Archie while walking down the street he was on the other side. It didn’t stop the low whines Pongo made as he called out her name, but it was easier to ignore him. She didn’t want to ignore him, but in the long run it would be easier.

Eventually Pongo made it so that Regina couldn’t ignore him. The pounding on her front door interrupted Regina’s morning. Reluctantly Regina answered the door to find a rather frazzled Archie as well as Ruby and all the Charming family excluding Emma and Henry, who were still out of town.  She looked at them blankly, the surprise most definitely not showing on her face.

“Who have I supposedly killed this time?” Regina said with a snarl.

Archie flinched and Regina would have felt bad about it but whenever she had to share the same space as Snow she tended to be a bit more apathetic to other’s feelings. And really, they were interrupting her morning at her house so they could all deal with a few nasty comments.

“Ah, no it’s not anything like that. It’s just that Pongo’s missing.”

Regina raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry but I fail to see how this concerns _me_. He’s _your_ dog.”

Archie blushed slightly. It was kind of overkill to have Ruby and the Charming family with him but he had been frantic when Pongo had darted away and down the street refusing to come back when Archie had called for him. He hadn’t known what to do so he had almost run to Granny’s to find Ruby. The Charmings had decided to tag along as soon as Ruby had agreed to track Pongo down. Ruby had followed Pongo’s scent across town to a rather isolated area that all of them knew rather well.

“I tracked him to this area and your house is the only one nearby.” Ruby said quietly. The mayoral manor really was quite large and took up plenty of land.

Regina sighed. “I doubt you’d just take my word for it that I don’t know where he is?”

Archie and Ruby shrugged while James just glared at her.

“Isn’t that just too bad? I have other things to do and you’re all wasting my time.”

There was a loud bark from down the driveway and everyone turned towards it. Pongo happily bounded up the driveway towards them before sitting down next to Regina.

“Well,” Regina said quickly. “there he is. You can leave my house now.”

Pongo let out a happy bark and darted inside the house. Regina spun around and glared at Pongo’s tail as it disappeared around the corner in the hall.

“Don’t you dare get your dirty paws on my furniture!” Regina said with a scowl. She turned back to the group on her porch. “It seems like you might just have to come in. As much as I’d like you to leave me alone, Pongo has other ideas.”

Regina entered her house with everyone following her. She headed down the hall towards the living room. It was annoying to have them all in her house but there wasn’t anything she could do about it (well, she could magic them all away but Henry wouldn’t appreciate it). She sat at the armchair and Pongo quickly moved towards her to rest his head in her lap and look up at her sadly.

“If you’re going to act like a pup about it, you can leave right now.”

Pongo let out a sharp bark and Regina just raised an eyebrow and scratched Pongo behind the ear.

“Regina? What’s Pongo doing here?”

Regina refused to look up at Snow. “I’ve never claimed mind reading to be one of my abilities, Miss  Blanchard. But if you really want to know, I can ask him. It would be much more accurate than whatever Miss Lucas could pick up on, and certainly more accurate than your magical abilities.”

Ruby sat up. “Hey, I’m fine at communicating to Pongo.”

Regina snapped her eyes up to Ruby her hand resting on Pongo’s head. “Recent events would prove otherwise. Just because you’re a mutt doesn’t mean that you can communicate with dogs. If you could then you would have been able to ask him about Dr Hopper’s so-called murder.”

David jumped up from his seat as Ruby just stared at Regina with her mouth slightly open and a soft blush on her cheeks. “Hey you have no right to talk to Ruby like that!”

“What?” Regina spat. “Sarcastic? Mean? _Truthful?_ I’d say I have every right to be angry at her seeing as her false confidence in what she saw led me to being framed for murder. There are very few people in our world who can talk to animals and neither Miss Lucas nor Miss Swan are among them. I fail to see how either of them were qualified to take an official _police statement_ from a _dog_.  It is a skill that must be taught or figured out and Miss Swan has done neither. Just because Rumple could show you a few memories doesn’t mean that you can understand them.”

David snorted. “And you can.”

“Of course dear. Who do you think taught your wife to talk to her annoying little birds? She never could manage the larger mammals. They didn’t respect her enough.”

Regina repositioned herself slightly and looked disdainfully at Snow. “And before you ask Miss Swan, no it is not magic. It is a skill. Once you learn to listen to animals it becomes easy enough to talk to them.”

“So, why’s Pongo here?”  Ruby asked quickly.

Regina looked down at Pongo. “Well?”

Pongo sat up, lifting his head from Regina’s lap as he barked and whined at her. After a few minutes Regina stroked his head and he quietened down.

“It’s okay Pongo. I don’t blame you and I wasn’t avoiding you. I was staying away from Dr Hopper, not you.”

Pongo barked happily a few times.

“Thank you. That means a lot to me, dear. Now are we quite done with this?”

In response Pongo lay down on Regina’s feet and rested his head on his paws. Regina sighed. “Apparently not.”

“Regina,”  Snow said slowly. “what was that?”

“Pongo apologised to me for leading you to believe that I had killed Archie. He hadn’t realised that you wouldn’t pick up on my scent in the memory you shared.”

“Your scent?”

“Yes, my scent. Pongo is a _dog_ and I’m sure even your proper princess education  taught you that dogs are well known for their extraordinary ability of smell. Pongo knew I hadn’t killed Archie because the ‘me’ that he saw didn’t smell right. He feels as if he is partially to blame even though it’s not _his_ fault that no one actually asked him if it was me.”

Charming looked a combination of shocked that no one had thought to ask Pongo if he was sure Regina had done it (or at least seen his reaction to her) and defensive about Regina’s insult to Snow’s upbringing. Archie just stared at Pongo sadly. Obviously he knew that Pongo had been bothered by this for a little while now.

Snow frowned. “How did Emma not pick up on the smell? Pongo obviously remembered it.”

Regina scoffed loudly before anyone could reply and stood up. “Miss Lucas wouldn’t have been able to do it and you want Miss Swan to? Despite your tendency to treat her like one, Miss Lucas is a _werewolf_ not an actual dog. I commend her abilities in human form but even she is not _dog_ enough to assume smell is the most important sense unless she specifically needs to use it, particularly when memory is involved. So until _you_ start thinking about identifying someone with only smell and ignoring the visual evidence, don’t go criticizing _your daughter_ for doing the exact same thing that you would do. If Ruby had no chance at figuring it out, what chance did Miss Swan have?”

Regina glanced down at Pongo. “Dear Lord, you’ve got me defending _that_ _woman_.”

Ruby stared at the ground, her checks red from embarrassment of being talked about in such a way, but a slight smile on her lips gave away that she kind of agreed with Regina.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry that I accused you of killing Archie. I guess I still felt a little bit resentful for the walk comment, and well, you don’t have the best track record. But I know you’re trying to change.” Ruby said slowly.

“Don’t be dear. There is plenty of blame to spread around for this unfortunate incident and very little of it falls at your feet. At least you didn’t believe a _dog_ over me, you believed yourself, even if you were miserably _wrong_. No offense meant, Pongo. _Now_ , if it’s okay with you, I have other things to do. Get out of my house.”

Everyone stood up and sort of awkwardly shuffled out the front door with Regina following them. If there was one thing to come from the day it was that they had all sort of dealt with things badly (Well, Ruby learnt that she kind of wanted to learn how to talk to animals too). The Charmings left quietly but waited at the bottom of the steps for Archie as he stood awkwardly in front of Regina. Ruby stood slightly behind him with Pongo.

“You know, Regina, I’m always free to talk. Even if it’s just when you see me on the street.” He smiled at her and turned around.

Ruby muttered a quiet ‘thank you’ before following him. It wasn’t clear if she meant for standing up to the Charmings about their treatment of her (even if they hadn’t really listened and she wasn’t going to follow up on it) or if it was for Regina telling Ruby she wasn’t to blame. Either way, Regina nodded her head at Ruby.

“Funny isn’t it?” Regina said quietly as if to herself. “The only real heart felt apologises that I’ve believed have been from a dog and the woman who really didn’t need to bother. I guess ‘charming’ is just a name after all.”

Snow turned quickly pointing a finger at Regina. “I apologised!”

“Excuse me if I find the apology lacking when half a second later you turned around and told me I had no right to know where my son was, let alone when he left town.”

David slowed his step and started to turn around. Regina quickly stepped back and shut her front door. She didn’t want to deal with pity apologises. And if the Charmings wanted to look like they had less manners than a dog that was their own prerogative.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pongo and Regina see each other a lot during their cursed time in Storybrooke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hadn’t intended to continue these Pongo and Regina friendship moments, but I sort of love them so I’m probably going to write a few more. Stoic Last Stand made me want to keep writing, so thanks. This isn’t one of the ideas you threw to me, but I’m going to work on one of those ones soon.  
> Disclaimer: Nope, I don’t own OUAT yet.

The first day of the curse Regina had almost greeted Pongo the moment he strained against the lead Archie was holding. She had stopped herself just in time. Talking to dogs was a little too close to magic (at least in a world without magic) and Regina wasn’t going to screw this up on the first day. She watched Pongo (and therefore Archie) as they passed her, but ignored everything that came out of the man’s mouth. Regina could already tell that she would find him annoying.

The second day Regina was prepared and she nodded her head towards Pongo. Archie greeted her back enthusiastically, but Pongo’s quick yip told her that he had understood the acknowledgement was meant for him.

By the end of the first month Pongo and Regina had fallen into an easy routine where Pongo yipped at her and Regina nodded, pretending she was agreeing with Archie’s ‘lovely day’ comment. She had been right, he was annoying as hell.

After a year Regina didn’t always nod at Pongo, but he certainly still greeted her happily. Sometimes he asked her if she was okay or if he could do something to help her. She very definitely looked away when he did that.

The first time Regina walked past Pongo after having not seen him for several weeks (she was still getting used to having a baby and that meant changing her schedule dramatically) he barked nonstop until Archie literally had to pull him away down the street. Regina had just been happy that Henry hadn’t woken up from the nap he was taking in his stroller.

When Henry was five, Regina started up her morning walks again. She had spent the past few years going into work later and coming home earlier with a pile of paper work to take care of at home, but it had been worth it to spend more time with Henry. But now he was five and was starting school, which meant earlier mornings, and earlier mornings meant walking past Pongo again. And Archie, but he was only a minor nuisance.

Regina and Henry walked hand in hand down the road on the way to school. Henry was excited and bounced with each step. Regina had to fight down the dread that had been building up ever since she had enrolled Henry in school. She didn’t want him to spend more time away from her; it seemed like only yesterday that she had gotten him.

Pongo let out a confused whine when he saw Regina and Henry. He tilted his head as Henry giggled at him. Regina would have pulled Henry past Archie and Pongo, but Henry was clearly interested in Pongo. He was such a caring boy; he loved to talk to people and animals alike. They came to a stop in front of Archie. Regina ignored Archie’s slightly surprised look and turned to Henry.

“Is there something you’d like to ask Dr Hopper, Henry?”

Henry nodded happily. “Can I pat doggie?”

“Oh, of course you can Henry.” Archie said quickly. He would have agreed to anything Henry wanted simply because the Mayor was glaring at him like _that_.

Regina crouched down next to Henry and held her hand out. Pongo quickly stepped forward and placed his head under Regina’s hand. She gave him the scratches he was almost begging for.

“Henry, this is Pongo. Pongo, this is my son, Henry. Go on, he won’t bite.”

Henry put his hand out for Pongo to sniff. He had been lectured about quite a few things before Regina was comfortable (who was she kidding, she still didn’t like the idea of not having Henry around all day) letting Henry go to school. How to act around potentially dangerous animals was one of them. Pongo ducked his head and let Henry pat him clumsily before licking the boy’s fingers. After a few minutes Regina stood and ran her fingers through Henry’s hair.

“Come on henry, we need to get you to school.”

Henry nodded but wasn’t happy to be led away from Pongo. Regina didn’t bother excusing herself to Archie. She made a mental note to make Henry wash his hands once they got to the school.

Much like Regina had predicted each day that she walked Henry to school was a day that she saw Archie and Pongo. Each day Pongo sat at Henry happily starched him behind the ears. For once Regina could actually greet Pongo (and Archie, but she didn’t care about him). It was … nice.

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pongo is distressed over someone breaking into Archie's office during the night and it's up to Regina to sort it out.

Regina hadn’t expected to be accosted by Archie and Ruby moments after she walked through the doors to the diner. She had just wanted coffee and nice company which Regina normally took in the form of Granny. Granny had been rather welcoming ever since the apology fiasco a few weeks ago and Regina knew enough about being a mother to know that apparently she had done something right by Ruby, and thus right by Granny. It also probably had something to do with Cora’s death. Ever since she had been forced to kill her mother, Granny and Ruby had both been much more accommodating. Granny probably more for Ruby’s benefit and Ruby probably because she felt they shared the same burden of accidental matricide (both of which could be laid at Snow’s feet but Regina tried not to go there because it just made her angry and anger made her magic act up). They never _talked_ about it, but it was slightly reassuring that someone was nice(er) to her. And Granny’s stifled laugh after the ‘blackened sole’ comment to Snow had really endeared her to Regina. She’d later gotten a list of witty food based quips and the diner’s specials schedule for the next month on her front door step. Regina hadn’t used any yet, but she had certainly memorised them all.

Granny had just handed Regina her coffee when Archie, Ruby and Pongo entered the diner. Granny scowled.

“Ruby, I love Pongo slightly more than I love any other animal, but he’s still not allowed in the diner. It’s unhygienic.”

Pongo, bless him, started to head towards the door before his leash pulled taunt because Archie wasn’t moving with him.

“I understand the need to keep the diner clean, Granny.” Archie said quietly. “I just need a quick word with Regina and every time I leave Pongo he starts getting nervous. I can’t even leave him with Ruby.”

Ruby pouted. “I’m worried about him.”

Regina glanced down at her coffee and sighed. She hadn’t even paid for it, yet alone taken a sip. Granny gave her a look of sympathy, which from pretty much anyone else, Regina wouldn’t have accepted. But Granny wasn’t showing sympathy for anything more than being too busy to even have a cup of coffee undisturbed. Which really, wasn’t asking for much. She pulled a twenty out of her purse and laid it on the counter before picking up her coffee mug and heading outside to sit on one of the slightly damp chairs laid out there. She crossed her ankles and sipped her coffee while Ruby and Archie took a seat at the table with her. Pongo happily sat down at Regina’s feet and rested his head on the ground next to her. If anything it seemed like he needed a long nap. No one said anything so Regina just continued to sip her coffee.

It took ten minutes before Ruby became fed up with waiting and that probably mostly had to do with the fact that she knew Granny would call her to work soon.

“Aren’t you going to ask him what’s wrong?”

Regina glanced down at a sleepy Pongo and nudged his side with her foot. He let out a disgruntled woof.

“Well that was rude. You may want to nap but I have things to do with my day that don’t involve translating your problems for Hopper to solve. Anyway, I doubt having been a cricket makes him a qualified animal psychologist.”

Pongo let out another woof before Ruby or Archie could say anything about Regina’s comment. This woof was decidedly whinier than the other one had been.

“Really, again? What is with that moggie? He never can seem to stick to his own house. I’ll talk to him.”

Regina finished her coffee before turning to Archie.

“Air out your office and lock the windows when you leave for the night. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have someone to track down.”

/-/-/-/-/

Regina had spent the better half of the morning looking for the ginger and white tom cat that had gotten on Pongo’s nerves both in Storybrooke and in fairytale land. It wasn’t until eleven that Regina managed to track him down and she almost decided to just leave it and charm Archie’s office against intruders when she realised the she needed to head into the sheriff’s station. Instead she just sighed and straightened her shoulders, ready to ignore everything but that damned cat. So she did.

Regina ignored Emma’s questions and David’s posturing and instead she went into one of the cells and reached under the bunk to snag two struggling balls of fluff. One was pure white while the other was a smoky grey. It only took a second before an orange fluff ball, just as small as the two in her hands was attempting to hiss and swipe at her foot. She moved the white kitten to her other hand and picked up the orange one by the scruff of it’s neck. It continued to spit and hiss at her.

“Really now! What bad manners; I believe Duchess raised you better than that.”

The kitten stopped hissing and looked away a little guiltily. The white kitten mewled at the ginger one quite loudly and Regina had to supress a smirk at the telling off it was getting. She gently placed the kittens on Emma desk.

“Now, I don’t know any of your names. But I am sure your mother is worried sick about you.”

Regina paused as each of the kittens mewled at her. “It is a pleasure to meet you Toulouse, Marie and Berlioz. May I ask where Thomas is? I doubt he would leave you alone, Duchess would murder him.”

Toulouse, the ginger kitten who was apparently the eldest answered and Regina just sighed. That damn tom cat was always getting into trouble. This time he had gotten himself trapped in the interrogation room while adventuring the night before with the kittens. Regina petted all three of the kittens and they started to purr. They had obviously been there all night, not knowing what to do and both David and Emma had been too oblivious to notice them. Regina glanced up. Emma was trying to hide a smile and David stared at her slack jawed.

“David, if you would be so kind as to unlock the interrogation room, this would move along a lot faster.”

“Why don’t you do it?”

“Because you’re the deputy with the keys.” She said in a slow drawl.

David grabbed the keys off the desk and headed to the interrogation room. Seconds after the door was opened a ginger and white blur sped out and jumped up onto Emma desk to wrap around the kittens there.

“You have to stop doing this, especially with the kittens.”

The tom cat ignored her and licked at the kittens. Regina scowled and flicked the end of his tail. He turned around with a sharp yowl that died in his throat when Regina flicked his ear. He sat down with a scowl and his ears pressed back against his skull.

“Abraham de Lacy Giuseppe Casey Thomas O'Malley you listen to me right now. You will stop wandering into other people’s property at night and you will _stay away_ from Pongo’s home. That includes Hopper’s office. If I get another complaint that ruins a perfectly good day I will make sure Duchess hears about it. Are we clear? And that’s not even taking into consideration you took her kittens out into town in the middle of the night and got _separated_ from them, leaving them _defenceless_.”

Thomas ducked his head and agreed. The scariest thing in his life was most certainly an angry Duchess, but an angry Regina was pretty high up there as well.

“Now, I am taking you all back home and this better be the last I hear about it.”

She turned and marched out the door; Thomas, Toulouse, Marie and Berlioz all trotting out after her though Thomas did look rather put out.


	5. Chapter 5

Somehow Granny always managed to have a cup of coffee just the way Regina liked it waiting by the time Regina arrived at the diner. It wasn’t black, despite what everyone assumed. Black coffee was unlike anything they’d had in fairytale land and Regina hadn’t quite adapted to the bitter taste, even after all this time. 

Regina was starting to think that Granny had a security camera outside her house just to make sure that the coffee was ready on time. Regina had stared testing her theory by leaving her house both earlier and later than normal as well as taking longer routes than she normally did. Granny had always been there with her coffee and it was starting to get to Regina. 

She had come up with a plan that involved skipping her morning coffee at the diner in favour of arriving in the middle of the lunch rush. It should have worked because despite not being mayor anymore, Regina was one for schedule and she normally made it to the diner in the morning on her way to town hall. 

While Snow was the legal and voted in mayor, Regina still snuck into town hall well before Snow did to grab all the latest files and folders to look over so that Snow didn’t do too much damage to her town. Snow never noticed the minor changes or suggestions scrawled into the margins. As far as she knew, Brandi - Regina’s old secretary - was the one that read through the files. She had been told that it was the way things were done, and not knowing better, Snow had allowed it. Brandi coming up to Regina after a month of Snow being mayor and begging for help had been incredibly amusing to Regina and the main reason she had agreed to help. Brandi was a good secretary, if she thought Snow was running Storybrooke into the ground, she probably was.

But once again Granny just greeted Regina and handed her a perfectly made cup of coffee. Now she was pretty sure the old woman was doing  _ something _ dodgy in order to know when she’d arrive. Instead of making as fuss though Regina just sat herself down at the counter in her normal chair. It was in the middle of the lunch rush and she did kind of like Granny and Ruby so she wouldn’t make their lives harder. 

Yet. 

It was still an option, particularly if Granny didn’t stop being creepy. Granny hadn’t even bothered taking her order; instead she just served the chicken caesar salad and grumbled about Regina’s lack in variety. Regina would have ordered something new by now (in fact she had tried several dishes while under the curse that she quite liked that Granny just didn’t remember about) if it didn’t annoy Granny so much. Watching Granny grumble was hilarious, particularly considering it wasn’t really aimed at her, at least not maliciously. 

Towards the end of the lunch rush, Emma came in. She sat down at her booth and dropped her head to the table looking completely exhausted. Ruby didn’t even manage to get across the diner to get Emma’s order before a man had approached and started talking to her. Ruby paused in her walk and lent against the counter next to Regina. She sighed deeply. Ruby’s hands clenched around her order note pad and Regina decided to actually pay attention to what has happening at Emma’s table. 

The man had long black hair but a long white beard, dark brown skin and when he turned his head to the side Regina could just make out a long scar that slashed across his left eye. Emma’s head was still resting on the table but that didn’t stop the man from talking to her. From what Regina could make out he was complaining about some stray animals or something.

“I’m on my lunch break. If you have a problem, take it up with David at the station.” Emma muttered, though the man ignored her and kept ranting.

Regina smirked slightly. “I wouldn’t think he’d have problems with animals. I’m surprised any come near him actually.”

Ruby flicked her eyes to Regina. “You know him?”

“Hmm, yes. We met briefly before I let him flee into the Enchanted Forest.” Regina’s lip curled up in disgust. “I’m not surprised he wanted to leave his land. It’s a terribly dirty place. Run by animals though, so what could you expect?”

“I don’t get it.”

“Well you see Scar was one of those animals; a lion to be exact. He may not be in lion form anymore, but some things transcend form. Wouldn’t you agree, Miss Lucas?”

Ruby sniffed the air discreetly. “No wonder I don’t like him. Damn cat.”

Regina froze as she felt the air in the diner become thicker. She turned to Emma in time to see her slam her fists down on the table.

“I’m on my fucking lunch break!”

Regina hands shot out, one grabbing Granny’s upper arm from where she stood near the till and the other wrapping around the back of Ruby’s neck as she started towards Emma, probably to get Scar to leave her alone. Ruby let out a small yip from being grabbed so roughly and a gold magic cloud billowed through the diner. Regina released her own magic, letting purple clouds of magic engulf her, Granny and Ruby. The sound of bodies falling to the ground or heads hitting tables echoed through the diner as the smoke cleared. Regina quickly dropped her grips on Granny and Ruby and looked around the diner. Not a single person besides them was conscious, including Emma.

“Was that …  _ Emma? _ ”

Regina sighed and stood, making her way to one of the patrons nearby. She gently pulled his face out of a bowl of soup. 

“Miss Swan does have dormant magical abilities and magic tends to react to strong emotional outbursts. You wouldn’t believe the amount of glasses I shattered accidentally while living with Snow and Leopold.”

Ruby gestured around the diner. “This isn’t exactly the same as breaking a few glasses.”

“No, but I certainly felt more rage than Miss Swan, and her cognitive capabilities seem to be impaired at the moment.” Regina moved back to her meal and sat down. She was not dealing with this on an empty stomach or without coffee.

Granny was moving around the diner making sure no one else was drowning or suffocating like the first man Regina had saved from his soup. Ruby started to move around cleaning up any food that had ended up on the floor or on tables.

“Did you just call Emma stupid?”

Regina sipped her coffee. “Would you agree that when people are frustrated or tired they are less focused?”

Granny snorted. “Oh, that’s definitely true.”

“Miss Swan is frustrated and less focused, hence why her magic exploded into this mess. Miss Swan is not stupid, though she certainly has her moments. She was distracted and her magic leaked out because she couldn’t pay enough attention to keep it in check. Much like when you try to not ‘wolf out’ as Henry has started to call it, Miss Lucas.”

“What did you do with your magic anyway?” Ruby said as she half crawled under a table to pick up someone’s dropped cutlery.

“I simply buffered Emma’s magic away from us and created a shield of similar magic to keep it away.”

“Why?” Granny asked simply from where she had sat next to Regina casting a critical eye around her diner. She was happy to let Ruby be the one bending over and crawling on the floor.

“I need  _ someone _ to tell Snow and that Blue Bitch that I didn’t do this.” Regina sneered.

“You  _ swear _ ?” Ruby said as she popped up from underneath a table, nearly banging her head on the way up.

Regina rolled her eyes and drained the last of her coffee, giving Granny a look of exasperation that was returned.

“Yes dear, I swear on occasion. Particularly when I’m talking about self-righteous fairies that lack any sort of useful magical knowledge despite living for hundreds of years and have rather dubious moral compasses when things don’t go their way.”

“Um…”

“Why don’t we just deal with the problem at hand so that we you don’t feel obliged to defend the moral integrity of people who don’t deserve it?” 

“Good idea. But I get the feeling we’ve got a bit of a problem.” Granny said before making her way over to the door and opening it.

“What’s that, Granny?”

“Well, you’d think someone would come running if they saw gold smoke all over the place.”

Ruby nodded and walked up behind Granny. “Yeah, I guess – oh. That’s not good.”

Regina waited a few seconds but when neither woman thought to say anything else she decided to join Granny and Ruby staring out the diner door.

“Shit.”

“We weren’t even talking about the Blue Fairy this time.” Ruby said with a smirk.

“Do be quiet, dear.”

Regina took a few steps out of the diner and reached a hand towards the pale gold, shimmering barrier. It surrounded the diner in a large dome that was only just high enough to cover the diner’s roof. As her hand reached closer Regina could feel the barrier try to attach to her magic and drain it. Interesting. It obviously wasn’t self-sustaining but drawing energy from somewhere. Just as Regina was about to head back inside she heard the fall of rapid footfalls. Snow and Charming appeared skidding to a stop on the other side of the barrier. She was slightly impressed at their speed; it wasn’t exactly a short walk to the diner from town hall. She wouldn’t tell them that though.

“Regina! What have you done?”

Regina sighed. “Unfortunately, I can’t take credit for this disaster. It would make our lives a lot easier if that were the case. As it is, I’m as trapped in this barrier as much as you are out of it.”

Ruby appeared from inside the diner and nodded to Snow. “She didn’t do it. It was Emma. Who knew your daughter was so kick ass with the magic, Snow?”

Snow frowned. “You’re sure?”

“Well, the gold cloud  _ did _ come from Emma and I see zero reasons why Queenie here would do anything like this.”

“ _ Queenie? _ Watch your mouth, Miss Lucas. I may not have cast the barrier, but I still have magic.”

“So?”

“ _ So _ , you are stuck inside a magical barrier with me for the foreseeable future and there are only so many hiding places in the diner. I don’t for a second think your grandmother would begrudge me turning you into a chihuahua for being disrespectful.”

“She’s right, I wouldn’t!” Granny called from inside the diner.

Ruby scowled playfully at Regina. “You’re so abrasive.”

“I’m not the one with little dog syndrome.”

Charming shoved a finger at Regina as best he could with the barrier in the way. “You will not harm Ruby in any way!”

Regina sighed and rolled her eyes. “Of course not, at least not permanently. It’s called an empty threat, Charming. You should know, it’s the only type you can make. Besides, Miss Lucas and Granny are the only people besides myself who can make my coffee the way I like it.  Now, if you don’t mind I need to get to work getting this barrier down before it collapses itself.”

Snow was looking at Ruby curiously, but spoke to Regina. “What happens if it collapses? Surely that’s a good thing?”

“The barrier will collapse when there is no more magic sustaining it. Most barriers are self-sustaining; they take energy from the things that touch them like the wind or the sun.  Admittedly the occasional bird or animal is included, but not on purpose. They’ll last forever, or until someone breaks through it. This barrier Emma made is not like that. Unlike the self-sustaining barriers, this one is taking energy from a living source.”

“I don’t understand, what does that mean?”

“The barrier will collapse when there is no more energy for it to take. Right now I suspect it is taking energy from anyone in the diner who isn’t shielded, including Miss Swan. That’s why all of the diner’s patrons are unconscious. Eventually it will kill them. Now, I have more important things to do than discuss magical theory with you while you nod along and pretend you know what I’m talking about.”

Before Snow or Charming could say a word Regina put her fingers in her mouth and let out a loud whistle. A few seconds later an answering bark echoed down the road and Pongo appeared next to Charming, his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth and his leash trailing in the dirt behind him it didn’t take long for an out of breath Archie to follow him up to the diner.

“Hello Pongo. I need your help to retrieve something. Can you do that for me?”

Pongo barked happily and nodded his head. He moved forward to sit as close to the barrier as possible and Regina knelt in front of him.

“I need you to find something, or a combination of somethings with more magical power than Miss Swan.”

Pongo let out a low whine. 

“Yes, I understand that it will be tricky given her potential, but it won’t be possible to protect Miss Swan until the barrier is draining most of the energy it needs from something that isn’t her. Can you do it?”

Pongo huffed, looking offended before nodding and dashing off. Regina watched him until he disappeared around the corner. Archie just shook his head and decided to wait for Pongo to come back, he wasn’t fit enough to run around after a dog for extended periods of time. Besides, he trusted that Regina wouldn’t get Pongo into too much trouble. Regina nodded at him briefly before turning around to head back into the diner.

“Wait!”

Regina paused at Snow’s yell, glancing over her shoulder.

“Regina, what can we do?”

“Make sure no one touches the barrier and call me when Pongo gets back. I’ll sort out the rest, dear.”

Regina headed inside. There wasn’t much she could do without whatever it was the Pongo would fetch her, but sitting inside was certainly preferable to waiting with Snow. Ruby followed her in shortly after and Granny set her to work cleaning all the surfaces in the diner.

“So, how do you talk to animals anyway? Isn’t that more Snow’s thing?”

Regina snorted and shot Ruby an offended look. She ignored Granny’s chuckle from where the woman was seated at a table whittling her own crossbow bolts (Regina still wasn’t sure where the hell the crossbow had come from in the first place, there wasn’t an armoury in Storybrooke and it was a very modern crossbow).

“I learnt to talk to animals well before Snow even knew it was a possibility.”

“Could you teach someone?”

“Yes.” Regina said as she sat down at her previous seat. “But one would have to be inclined to learn and there are very few people in this town that have the patience to do so.”

Ruby scrubbed at the counter for a few long minutes but said nothing. Regina sighed deeply and rubbed a hand over her face.

“Yes.”

Ruby’s head shot up. “What?”

“Yes. I could teach you. You have the essential ability that everyone else in this town lacks.”

“What’s that?”

“The ability to sit, listen, and only speak when asked.”

“Really, Regina? Dog jokes.”

“Someone has to keep you on your toes, we don’t want you rolling over and playing dead.”

“You’re a bitch.”

“It takes one to know one, Miss Lucas. Now, do you want to learn or not?”

Ruby bit back her response and nodded.

“Then sit down.”

Ruby sat on the stool next to Regina and Regina shuffled slightly, making herself comfortable.

“Hundreds, maybe thousands of years ago humans and animals lived together. They survived only because they lived together, the animals often supplying food and knowledge of the land and humans supplying shelter, fire and protection from larger predators through numbers. But the amount of humans grew, and eventually what the animals were able to find or hunt for food wasn’t enough to sustain both humans and animals. So the humans did what they do best, they betrayed the animals and became the hunters. The split was violent and at the end the animals refused to ever help the humans again and to make sure that they would never fall into an alliance with them they made a pact. They would not talk to the humans in the human tongue ever again. And they never did.”

“Is … is that true?”

Regina snorted. “Of course not. Animals could never speak the same way humans can, at least not in the Enchanted Forest, there are a few realms that different. Like the world that Scar came from, and Oz. The point of the story Miss Lucas, is that animals do not speak to us in a way that we understand, we have to learn to listen to them. They already know how to listen to us.”

“So, how do I learn to listen to them?”

“You already know how to; the same way you listen to your wolf. Learn to respect them and understand that they are intelligent creatures not just things for humans to use. That’s the end of the lesson. I hope you paid attention, there will be a quiz later.”

Ruby snorted. "You haven't got enough time to write a pop quiz, let alone administer one."

"Who says I don't have one already made up?"

Ruby just rolled her eyes."So when you talk to Pongo is it words or a general feeling of what he means?"

"Good question, Miss Lucas. " Regina said with a small smirk. "It's both really. It also changes between animals. Pongo is around a lot of humans, he's picked up a pretty large vocabulary, but even he can't always come up with the words he needs. Sometimes it's a combination of words, feelings, sounds and smells. The hard part is figuring it all out. Pongo is easy to talk to, he knows how to communicate better than most of the people I know."

"Why is that?"

"Because he wants to talk to people." Regina smiled slightly. "I had a stallion once who refused to talk to me because he was offended by how dark the clothes I wore were. He was a very conservative steed. I ended up selling him because it was such a problem."

"You got schooled in fashion by a horse!" Ruby laughed. "If he wouldn't talk to you how in the world did you ever find out?"

"Horses are terrible gossips, all the other horses in my stable told me. If they hadn't gotten annoyed at him I never would have sold him. He was good breeding stock."

"I can't even - " Ruby stopped short, her head tilted to the doorway. "Pongo's back, and apparently  he bought your excuse to swear."

Regina sighed as she stood. Going through the doorway she found Pongo sitting at the edge of the barrier, happily panting with something stick like in his mouth. A smile curled over Regina's mouth as she realised what it was. Pongo had stolen a fairy wand, and if Blue was any indication it was hers. Regina knelt in front of Pongo as Blue approached, well out of breath.

"Good job, dear. That will work perfectly. Now if you just nudge that gently into the barrier I should be able to fix this mess."

"Regina!" Blue exclaimed as Pongo started to do as he was asked. "What have you done this time? Why have you enslaved Pongo?"

"I'm sure Pongo would be deeply insulted by the insinuation that he could be enslaved." Regina said as she stood.

Pongo grumbled in agreement.

"Anyway, I'm just trying to bring this barrier down in a way that doesn't kill of twenty people. Nothing devilish, better luck next time. Maybe you can pin something else on me then. I hear it might rain tomorrow."

Regina quickly entered the diner again and made her way to Emma. Let Snow and Charming convince the gnat to part with her wand. It wouldn't be hard to separate Emma from the barrier, but it also wasn't going to be pleasant. Pulling at the magical strings surrounding Emma, Regia prepared to cut them. It was a tense few minutes before Regina felt the barrier latch on to the Blue Fairy's wand and loosen its grip on Emma. She pulled at the strings, snapping them with a soft golden sparkle.

Emma sat up quickly, along with everyone else in the diner who had previously succumbed to Emma's spell.

"Holy shit!"

"Indeed, Miss Swan. I think we're going to have to talk about magic lessons. Otherwise you're going to flatten the whole town, and we can't have that." 

Regina's own magic started to fill up the diner and with a loud crack the barrier popped, leaving nothing but a soft golden haze. Only Pongo and Ruby saw the purple smoke that engulfed Regina as she disappeared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took a long break from fanfic because I started writing professionally but I'm getting back into it. If there are any scenarios or characters you'd like to see in this story, just tell me and I'll see what I can do.


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